Still Standing

I was born in the rural Mississippi Delta to a 22 year-old single mother, raised in the midst of cotton fields by an aunt and uncle who were in their sixties when I was born. I didn't have the best or most expensive clothes; my hair was thick and kinky; my face was especially round. So, I was teased mercilessly in school; my nickname from the kids was 'pie-face'. I hated that name! When I wasn't being teased, I was totally ignored by the other kids; no one played with me during recess. The older I got, the more different I was. I tried to fit in, tried to look and fit the part, but nothing worked. I sought attention from boys, and all I got was used. I made my way to college, thinking surely things will be different. Wrong. Then in my sophomore year, the rug was pulled from under me. My mother was diagnosed with cancer in August (1989); she died four months later on December 21. My sister was only 16. We left my stepdad (her dad) and went to live with relatives. The years rolled by, and one by one loved ones passed away, all the ones who truly loved and cared for me. I met a wonderful man and got married, but Satan couldn't let that rest. He got a grip, and has run rampant in our family. People that I considered family, so-called friends, stabbed me in the back. Now my family may be in jeopardy. The clouds have been thick and dark, the storm has raged all over my life.

Now you may be saying, this does not sound good. But here's the thing: I'm still here. There is a silver lining in the midst of my dark clouds. I have two beautiful children (of course, my 14 year old and I battle daily, lol). My little boy is the sweetest, and my daughter (the 14 year old) has so much ambition. My sister and I, after some years of off and on strain, have reconnected in a way that is so amazing, and I feel closer to her now than ever before. And I have a gift: writing. It is my gift, my passion, my source of relaxation. And God has led me to avenues to share that writing, avenues that may lead to a whole new world of possibilities. So yes, my life has been filled with sadness, heartbreak, and pain. But through all the hard and sad times, through all the misery and heartache, through all the trials and tribulations, I'm still here. I'm Still Standing. And I'm still here for a reason. God allowed all these things to occur in my life for a reason, and He kept me through it for a reason. My breakthrough is coming; I have to endure, to see what the end's gonna be. Know this; you may be going through some serious trials right now; you may feel that God has deserted you, that you're alone and no one cares. I know, I've been there. But deliverance is just ahead; you're breakthrough is right around the corner. It is so true, what doesn't kill us, makes us stronger. Know what? I ain't dead yet! I, am Still Standing. And I Stand With You.